Author Topic: A new best friend  (Read 4896 times)

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Offline Philb

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A new best friend
« on: December 21, 2011, 08:07:44 PM »
After assisting Coco, our beloved Bichon of 8 years, over the Rainbow Bridge December 13, 2011, we have contact a breeder and a discussing getting a new female puppy. Part of us are all for getting another Bichon and part of us a hesitant. It will be only with great thought and prayer will we be able to make the right decision. Should members of this group choose to give advise, please do.

Offline nzbyrd

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #1 on: December 21, 2011, 08:17:31 PM »
Good for you Phil, only you and your wife will know what feels right. For a lot of people, that means getting a new pooch friend to help fill that empty space. And wouldn't Coco think that was awesome? Let us know what you decide...

kate1064

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #2 on: December 21, 2011, 08:30:45 PM »
Hi,
I had to make the decision to let Sophie go to the rainbow bridge almost 3years ago, she was 3 weeks short of her 15th birthday. It was very hard and i still miss her so much. She was a big part of my life and my families life, we all still talk about baby as she was affectionately known.
Lucy was 10yrs old and it was obvious she missed her friend as did i & i started looking for a pup.
Along came Bo who was 10wks, had been sold to an elderly woman but she couldn't cope with a young pup needing toilet trained-lucky for us though because this mischievous pup arrived and brought laughter to the house again  :nodding:
She still makes me laugh and i am so glad i got her. I believe in fate and Bo was meant to bring happiness back to my life after Sophie having dementia and becoming incontinent which was hard going at times. She was never bought to replace Sophie, she lives on in my heart.

You will know when you are ready to bring another bichon into your life, and i agree with Claire, Coco will be glad to see you happy again.
 
« Last Edit: December 21, 2011, 08:37:35 PM by kate1064 »

Offline darwinsmom (Chris)

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #3 on: December 21, 2011, 08:45:01 PM »
I think a new pup would definitely occupy your attention, which can help very much in healing. I guess as long as you realize that your new pup will be her own doggy, with wonderful qualities all her own- but not the same as Coco, then you're ready. 'When' you're ready doesn't matter one bit- that's as individual as grieving itself. If you listen to your heart, you'll know what's right.

Offline moraimag

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #4 on: December 21, 2011, 09:06:51 PM »
I also made the hard decision a few years back with Zara my 10yo shi-tzuh I didnt get another puppy right away first because my youngest boy was only 2 and needed a lot of my time and secondly because my building didnt allow pets although theres a lot of doggies living there as "contraband" but at the end I just miss having a furry friend and after researching different breeds instead of getting another shi-tzuh I ended up with my dear Xixi and I couldnt be happier. I still miss Zarita but I now think of her with joy and happiness, no more pain, only fond memories.

If you think that a new puppy will bring happiness to your home, as im sure it will, then go ahead and get her, she will never replace Coco but shevwill take a new special place in your hearts.

Offline joycethree

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #5 on: December 21, 2011, 09:15:49 PM »
I lost my 6 year old Bichon, Lucy in February and new right away that I needed someone to fill that void.  I found Dixie and got her about 2 months later.  She has been a real blessing.  She is a total opposite of Lucy in personality!!  She did not replace Lucy, but she gave me someone else to pour out my love and attention on!!  Looking forward to her coming, helped get me through the grieving period!

Offline BichonGodsGift

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #6 on: December 21, 2011, 10:03:30 PM »
I know what you are going threw I lost my Fluffy on November 16, 2011. He was only 7 years old and had no health problem that we know of. He was out running around came in the house laid down like he always dose and passed away.

Talk about a mixed bag of feelings. I am glad he did not suffer or have any illness that made his last days hard, and that it was fast. I am glad that he did what he loved and had a wonderful day before he passed. Then I am mad because he was not sick and h was to young. I am upset I was not holding him when he passed. I even feel a bit guilty that maybe had I checked on him sooner I could have saved him with CPR.

I do have a strong faith in God that has helped a lot and I feel he is with God just waiting and watching over me until I can join him again. I also feel he would want me to get an other Bichon so I did. I bought a 6 month old puppy that I named Fuzzy on December 3 so I did not go long without a Bichon.

I had some feelings that maybe I was trying to replace my Fluffy or just plane moving to fast but I am alone (no husband or kids) and the best thing for me was to get a puppy as soon as I could.

The puppy training has been the best therapy I could have.

So if you prayed about it go with your answer God gave you is my advise, but a puppy will help you heal.

Offline Freedom (Sandie)

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #7 on: December 21, 2011, 10:07:32 PM »
Grief is such a strange thing, different for each person, and different each time around.

When I lost my Mr. Amber Cat, I couldn't even THINK of getting another cat for over a year.  When I lost Dazzle, I knew I had room in my heart for another kitty, and adopted another within 2 weeks.  It is not that I loved Dazzle less, there are so many things which come in to play: the stage of your life, the circumstances of the loss, many many things.

I know this board has lots of info on finding a responsible breeder; take your time, do your research, and who knows, a puppy out there may be ready to join you.

Have you considered adopting a rescue bichon?  There are so many wonderful pups out there just needing a loving home. 
« Last Edit: December 21, 2011, 11:08:27 PM by Freedom (Sandie) »
Bichons Frise': Tasha, Willy, Riley, Belle, Frankie
Cats: Crystal, Ebony, Bobby, Tommy, Tuppence, Mandy, Emma

Offline chichsmum

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #8 on: December 21, 2011, 10:59:50 PM »
Please consider a rescue dog. I got a pup as a Senior and she was almost too much for me. There are many bichon frise in rescue. I would urge you that when you are ready to seriously consider giving one of these wee ones a forever home.

I was not going to get another bichon frise after my two passed on but then I could never consider in my heart another breed.

Good luck.

Carolyn

Offline Andrea

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #9 on: December 21, 2011, 11:46:41 PM »
I think that this is a decision that you and family will know when it is the right time.  It is so hard to loose our furbabies no matter what age they are and they leave such a large hole in our heart.  Another puppy cannot replace your Coco, but will bring with her/him a whole new beginning of a special relationship and help heal your heart.  Please let us know what you decide.  

Offline Alison

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #10 on: December 22, 2011, 06:34:43 AM »
You will know whent the time is right.There's no rush and now or later is fine.I suspect of you have contacted the breeder and get to see some pups then one look will be all it takes

Coco will be delighted to have another little one come along to help you smile again.

We will all be so delighted to meet your new friend.Alison


Offline Anna25

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #11 on: December 22, 2011, 08:55:36 AM »
You will know in your heart when you are ready.  Some people can get another puppy pretty quick and then there are others like me that it took many many years.  One is not more right than the other.  Listen to your heart...God whispers there.

Offline Lin

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #12 on: December 22, 2011, 12:07:40 PM »
I too can relate to your situation Phil. I always thought Maxi Girl would be our last dog, but within months after her passing that changed. Our house was not a home without the pitter pater of muddy paws and high pitched barking. Within a year I had not just one pup, but two.
A new pup in your life will never replace the special place Coco holds in your heart, but it will help heal the loss. The natural love we have for all animals will blossom and the good times will be remembered. Listen to your heart, you'll know what is right for you.
You are in my thoughts during this difficult time.  :comfort:

Thank you Alison!

Lizzie

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #13 on: December 22, 2011, 08:04:53 PM »
There are only two people who can make the decision Phil and that is you and your wife.   I have been surrounded by many bichons for 20 years so have never had to make that choice of to be or not to be.   The ones that we have lost we still hold dearly in our hearts and often sit and smile at some of things they used to get up to.  I even tell the younger ones - "If your grandfather was here ......"  Yes I'm crazy. :blush2:

I think you have both made your decision already and I wish you the best of luck.  Coco will always live in your hearts.  She will be watching over you.  :angelwings:


Offline BB56 (Donna)

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Re: A new best friend
« Reply #14 on: December 22, 2011, 09:04:11 PM »
I agree that it is a very individual decision and you will know when it is right for you. When I lost my last dog Mookie (an American Eskimo) when he was 15, I found the house to be so sad and empty without him. We soon brought  Bella home and I never considered her a replacement but thought of her as a tribute to Mookie--because he taught us the joy of sharing our life with a pet and made our house a home we knew we were not complete without a fluffy child around (or two as Buddy joined us a year later!). I still think of Mookie always and smile at all the joy he brought us. Trust your instinct as there are no right or wrong ways to grieve and heal.



Thanks Alison!